Spiritual Friendship: What It Is and What It Looks Like

“The Creator arranged things so that we need each other.”— Basil of Caesarea

About a year ago, I bought a phenomenal book related to spiritual disciplines. These disciplines assist us in growing an intentional and constant relationship with God and others.

While reading a section of the book, there was one discipline in particular that caught my attention. I had never heard about it. It was the spiritual friendship discipline.

This discipline's focus is to build a relationship where two people—or more—can naturally share about their faith in God and commit to support, pray, and encourage one another.

The spiritual friend can be a husband or wife, a family member, co-worker, or fellow Christian. The most important thing is that both people agree to grow spiritually and in faith together.

Isn't it a great idea to have the opportunity to talk about God and be supported in our faith driven journey?

Let's discover what characterizes this type of friendship so that once you finish reading this, you can begin the search for your spiritual friend.

Finding a Spiritual Friend

Before sharing what a spiritual friendship looks like, I must be responsible and point out some realities about developing new friendships.

1. Friendships require at least two people in agreement to build it.

2. Not all friendships will allow you to grow spiritually in a mature and consistent way.

3. Friendships take their time to grow steady and strong.

4. Friendships aren’t and can’t be forced.

5. Friendships can go through different seasons due to life changes. 

These truths allow us to understand that every friendship takes time, commitment, and effort to be built on a solid foundation.

What a Spiritual Friendship Looks Like

In the book I mentioned, Spiritual Disciplines Handbook: Practices That Transform Us by Adele Ahlberg Calhoun, six characteristics are presented as the foundation for a spiritual friendship.

Every spiritual friendship is characterized by:

• Walking alongside another person on their journey to grow together in faith, hope, and love.

• Committing to praying for each other and treating each other with love.

• Having fun and praying together.

• Knowing each other well enough to be a support, an encouragement, and a word from God for each other.

• Developing a healthy, interdependent friendship that encourages and nurtures the soul.

• Inviting that person to join you on the journey toward recognizing your own limitations. 

Is there someone that you thought about while reading these characteristics?

What You Gain from Having a Spiritual Friendship

If you still have doubts about this type of friendship or don't know how it could benefit your life, allow me to show you some advantages.

✅ You'll have someone to talk freely with about God and faith.

✅ You'll have the opportunity to share your concerns and questions about faith, and seek answers and guidance together.

✅ You'll perceive God's love through sincere friendship.

✅ You'll receive support, encouragement, and advice from a trusted Christian friend.

✅ You'll experience constant gratitude.

✅ You'll have someone who will help you stay strong and accountable, encouraging you to grow spiritually.

✅ You'll enjoy constant support throughout the different stages of your journey of faith.

Final Words

We often think that our journey of faith is something we must walk alone. But it doesn't have to be that way. In reality, we need people around us who support us, encourage us, and warn us if we’re not on the right path. We don't need to have many spiritual friends, but rather the right ones. In the same way, let us strive to be the right ones for them.

Take a Leap of Faith

Take a moment to ask yourself: Who in my life can I talk freely with about God? Once you've identified that person, reach out to them and ask if they would be interested in starting a spiritual friendship with you. Share what that means and how you can both grow through it. I'll be praying for you and your new spiritual friend! 🥰

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